Ballin’ in Tallinn

I escaped from Oslo and flew into Tallinn, Estonia on Estonian Air on Thursday.

I stayed at the Reval Park Hotel & Casino close to Old Town. The hotel was nice enough for the price and the poker action was very good. A lot of drunken, all-in playing. I saw people go all-in after a raise and re-raise with AJ offsuit on more than one occasion! Scarily, on both occasions, the other person called and the AJ turned out to be the best pre-flop hand! The stakes aren’t huge, but a lot of the players had up to $1,000 in front of them on a $5/$5 no-limit game, opening up lots of opportunities for big profits. I actually only played a total of two hours during my entire 5 day stay, however, but that is much more to do with the women and nightlife of Tallinn, and my jet lag, than because I didn’t want to play more poker with that kind of action! I would have loved to play more but more important things beckoned, including Estonian women and sleep.

I really feel sorry for young, single men who live in places like Canada, Australia, England, Scotland, Ireland etc. Those places are as inhospitable to young men as Mars is to, well, young men. I only thank gawd I discovered Asia, Latin America and places like Estonia before it was too late.

Tallinn is a pretty small town, so the nightlife isn’t super crazy or anything, but the guy/girl ratio is pretty amazing. And the girls are, well, I’d say from what I’ve seen so far, the hottest in Europe.

I walked into one disco called Venus on a Saturday night and felt like I was walking into a trap. There were about 150 people inside, almost all of them on the dance floor. It was about 130 girls and 20 guys??? It’s like bizarro Oslo where everything is opposite… and that’s a good thing.. And the girls, as stated above, are for the most part tall and very beautiful. The girls actually all seem to be really cool, classy and nice and quite open to talking with people who talk to them. Interestingly, the guys, on the other hand, are in general kinda goofy and don’t have much style. Many of them dance like it is a retard competition or something… you just have to see it to believe it.

Anytime the guy/girl ratio is so heavily skewed to the female AND the girls are exceptionally beautiful AND the guys are in general, dorks, well, that’s a recipe for happy Jeff. Combine that with relatively cheap prices and good poker action and you are just asking for me to hang around! In fact, I was going to leave on Saturday but ended up staying longer. I am leaving today (Monday) for Helsinki but would have no problem staying here longer.

The only bad thing about Tallin is the weather. It is similar to all those other frigid northern spots such as Oslo. It was quite chilly while I was here although I hear it is possible to be warm during the summer… some people I met spoke about how they brought their swimwear and were going to go to the summertime beach city of Parnu except the weather was so poor.

On Thursday night I saw this girl dancing who was one of those girls that EVERYONE, even subconsciously, just ends up staring at. Beautiful, blonde, blue-eyed and a really nice body and moves well. There was already lots of eye candy in the building but as I scanned the crowd my head reflexively snapped back the second I saw her. She was at a bit of a crazier-club called Hollywood. There were more guys at this club… about 50/50 and she had literally a ring of guys all encircling her, just staring. I actually had to fight through them like dense forest to get close enough to talk to her.

She had guy after guy going up and talking to her… and she was actually really nice to all of them, not telling them all to get lost or anything which I find is very common amongst the Estonian women. I wait in line for a while but then finally got my turn and introduced myself… she showed quite a bit of interest which surprised me, given the onslaught of competition.

I ended up losing track of her that night but saw her again Saturday night and got her info and met up with her on Sunday night. The girl is really stunningly beautiful. And not just that, but she is beautiful inside as well. She is 20… named Jana (pronounced Yana), doesn’t drink… doesn’t smoke…. Doesn’t swear, but only in Russian she told me. She’s too young to remember Adam Ant, luckily for her, but it left me kinda asking, “what do you do?� too!

She was actually born in Tallinn but moved to St. Petersburg when she was younger. Interestingly, in the meantime, the Soviet Union collapsed and so she is now a Russian citizen who needs a visa to visit Tallinn.

She plans to return to St. Petersburg today and after Helsinki I might go visit her there.

So, after only a few days in Estonia I had already met one of Estonia’s most beautiful girls and actually one of the classiest girls I’ve ever met. What a country.

For any guys that don’t know it, if you live in any of those aforementioned anglosphere hellholes, but want a nice, beautiful girlfriend, go to Asia, Latin America or, if you prefer the European continent: Estonia. Or be like me and have girls in all 3 ;). Not sure where I’m going next but I may check out Latvia, Belarus, the Ukraine, Moldova, Romania and Poland before I regress either West to Mexico or East to Thailand, TBA.

Besides, this may be the last chance to get into countries such as the Ukraine, comfortably, for a while. I already had to scratch Georgia off my list after the US backed terrorist attack of South Ossetia was, rightly, resisted by Russia who is none too happy that the US military industrial complex is placing missiles all around Russia’s borders now, including Poland and soon, possibly, the Ukraine. It’d be like Russia placing nuclear warheads in Mexico and Canada, pointed at the US. They tried something like that once in Cuba in the 60s and that almost ended up blowing up the world. Yet, Americans are yet again fed propaganda that this was a Russian aggressive action – if they are even aware of it at all. As we speak the fascist evil American empire has placed a warship at a Georgian port. All it will take now for massive open warfare will be for the usual American orchestrated false flag, fake attack on one of its own ships to draw Russia into a battle that could have many building nuclear shelters, yet again. Meanwhile America tunes in to the NFL and slips further into ignorance. I hate to say it but many in the US deserve what is coming to them. I just hope they get that wall on the Mexican border built fast to keep them out of Mexico once Homeland Security begins rounding them up for their work camps. I don’t want to be bothered by the broke, bankrupt rabble that may try to escape from the north while I am relaxing poolside in the land of the free, Mexico.

Anyway, who knows, maybe I’ll hang around in St. Petersburg with this Estonian beauty, eat homemade borscht and learn some Russian. Not for too long though, that Siberian winter looms not far off.

In the meantime I’m on a ferry to Helsinki as we speak. It’s less than 2 hours away and I hear this week is the Finnish Poker Championship so I thought I’d sail across and see what’s up. As a point of interest, every country on my prospective travel list above all appear to have some degree of poker action. So I am considering this my Eastern Europe late summer poker tour. Now that I have escaped from Amsterdam and Oslo things appear to be looking up!